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I short date men who Tall tourism

By Uplifted.


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Many of us suffer from heightism. Today I thought it would be a fun topic to discuss about women dating short guys. Yup, classic stories about that involves heightism. Fun fact 1: I once dated a girl who was taller than me. We dated because she thought I was confident and funny. So, dear short men.

Melicent
Years old I'm just over sixty
Orientation: Male
What is my hair: Ash-blond
What I like to listen: Hip hop
What is my hobbies: Cooking

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My date with a really short guy I met on Match. Before moving to Boston for a summer internship, I was dumped by a guy I thought was the love of my life.

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I arrived in Boston and dived into internet dating to distract myself from the pain. I was convinced a summer fling was just what I needed to get my mind off my heartbreak and boost my wounded ego.

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I was looking for something casual. At 23 years old, I had never tried online dating, and I set the bar low. How much can you really know about someone from their dating profile? I reasoned. A guy reached out to me on Match.

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I scoped out his profile and found nothing remarkable—no interesting hobbies but also no questionable face tattoos. He seemed nice enough, and I was anxious to start dating, so I agreed.

We planned to meet at a casual sandwich shop near a bike path that ran along the Charles River. I arrived early, wearing a sundress, wedges, and light make-up — a look to show I was trying, but not too hard. As I walked from the metro stop to the shop, I spotted him in the distance. My stomach fluttered, and I was suddenly aware of how unsteady I felt in my wedges.

I teetered towards my date and expected him to appear larger the closer I got. Instead, my depth perception seemed warped; he stayed small. How short is this guy? Wait a second, was he the guy who cropped all his photos so he was the only person in them? Finally, we were face-to-face. Well, face-to-breasts. I went through all five stages of grief in a matter of seconds.

Spoiler alert: his height wasn’t the problem

Maybe my heels are really tall? Anger: That S. Bargaining: Well, I can deal with the height difference if we have chemistry. Depression: Great, I have to go on a date with a liar. I immediately questioned the move. Should I look down? Does it make him feel shorter? I kind of hate that I have to look down. Sigh — take a deep breath and keep an open mind. He reached out and shook my hand. The formality of the handshake threw me off. Long pause. Oh good, at least he seems nice. We grabbed a two-seater, and he offered to put in our orders at the sandwich counter.

As he walked towards the counter, I noticed he was wearing a long-sleeved button-up made of thick, stiff fabric. It was a Saturday, we were at a plastic basket and wax paper kind of establishment, and it was at least 80 degrees F 27 degrees C outside.

P.s. i love you

The sandwich counter was tall — at least five feet — and he was completely obscured by it. He stood there for a few moments unnoticed by the staff behind the counter. A few minutes passed. I thought he might call out for help, but he just stood there, seemingly unruffled.

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A line began forming behind him. To my horror, the people in line simply walked around him to place their orders. He was a non-presence. I felt like I was watching a bad SNL skit about an incredibly unassuming person who fades into the background in every situation. Did we leave him at the restaurant? Oh, there you are, Chris! Was it his height? His lack of assertiveness? After a line of three or four people moved through, he tried waiting at the cashier station where the counter was waist-height, and he was clearly visible.

Or make his presence known in some way?

'short guys often complain that it's hard to find a woman - i've never felt that way'

I also worried allowing the situation to play out any longer would emasculate him even more. I stepped back and let my date order, and I returned to our table. He returned with our food. We sat quietly and munched on sandwiches and fries.

Dating short guys: stories from taller women

We exchanged some unmemorable first date chitchat in-between bites. Have you lived in Boston long? First dates are always so awkward. I studied him as we ate. I found him neither good-looking nor bad-looking — brown hair, brown eyes, average face, the Wonder bread of men, nothing distinctive about him besides his height. We finished, walked outside, and lingered near the shop, unsure about how to end the date or what to do next.

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I wanted to prove to myself I was capable of seeing beyond his looks. There was a perfect summer breeze, and I enjoyed our walk for the most part. I did the heavy lifting in our conversation, keeping it going through awkward pauses and trailing sentences. We arrived back at the sandwich shop, and he offered me a ride home. Something stubborn inside of me wanted to give him a chance, so I accepted. I had him unknowingly drop me off a couple of blocks from my apartment. We pulled up, and I reached for the door handle to get out of the car. The door was locked. I looked to him to unlock it. Tell me when I can see you again.

We spent the whole afternoon together, and it was great.

'many women won't date anyone under 6ft'

I remained unmoved, and his tone turned argumentative. I reached for the door handle again, but it was still locked.

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I tried to unlock it manually, but he kept pressing the door-locking mechanism to keep it locked. My veil of politeness and composure disappeared. His face dropped. I felt for him but also heard warning bells ringing leave, leave, leave in my head. He paused for a moment and unlocked the door.

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I jumped out of the car and rushed down the block. I waited until his car passed me and turned a corner before I headed home. I now view my date as a more sympathetic character. And, I have no idea how hard it must have been to date as a short man. Sure, nowadays we have Peter Dinklage as evidence that short men are hot. But my date and I are elder millennials who grew up in the 90s and received a different message. What if my date had been online for years and tried being honest about his height without any takers?

What if he only resorted to hiding his height out of desperation? How demoralizing would it have been to go on dozens of dates to be turned down again and again, likely because of your height? At the time, I wanted to land a hot guy to make myself feel better about being dumped.