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Trying to make sense of the different swinging options?


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Same room vs separate room partner swapping

Forgot your password? My ificant other and I would like to swap with other couples. He is totally against same room sex as he said he doesn't want to see me having sex with another man and I don't think I'd feel comfortable or even enjoy the experience if we weren't in the same room together.

Has anyone ever had this dilemma before? If so, how did you deal with it? Is going off into separate rooms a usual situation. Depends on the couple.

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I can not imagine separate rooms, I want my support hubby there and I feel everything is OK as long as he is around. Nudesailing-for me it's the excitement of being able to look over at him or touch him or have him touching me while we're both with other people that I was hoping for.

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I just can't see how separate room sex would be fun. How can you concentrate on what you're doing while being distracted wondering what's going on in the other room?

For : couples swap separate rooms

The comfort level also factors in. I think I can enjoy it with my SO in the same bedjust knowing he's there if I start to feel overwhelmed or unprepared or uncomfortable with something. I would feel safe with him there and I'd be able to focus on having fun and not worry about the "what-ifs.

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As far as your dilemma goes you are just going to have to talk it out until you come up with a plan that you are both comfortable with. Of course, as soon as you get separate that mile stone, and meet a couple that wants to play, you then have to take into consideration what they want to do and are comfortable with.

I can tell you that most folks are going to only swap to do same room. It takes a while to find those couples though and even they usually will only do separate rooms after they get to room you and have played a time or two. Try watching the other couple or viceversa than see how you feel. It wouldn't be any fun if we were all the same. We swing with just one other couple and since they live a little over an hour away, it's always at least one sometimes 2 nights. We almost always start out together with an orgy.

Full swap vs. soft swap: what’s the big deal?

But after that, we usually break off and kind of "date" our swing opposites. Unlike the porn stallions, we don't just have sex sex sex. We do other stuff too. And if we are apart, when we do bump into each other, it's always hugs and kisses for our own spouses. We've done this for a while with just one couple and before this couple, we were monogamous with another couple out on the coast. It saves a lot of grief and trust issues; plus there's the desease thing that we don't have to worry about as well.

Maybe it is because I like the social part of swinging as much as the separate part. But when everyone is done, I like the laying there for awhile and chatting. If my Dog and his partner were in a different room we would either have to yell at each other or one of the couples would have to get up and come into the other room and settle back down. This way we can all separate roll over and chat. Hi Sirena, it's exactly the same for me. Same-room sex is especially great to my hubby and I because of the visuals of the entire experience huge turn-onand also because of the closeness and connection we feel swap when we're playing with other people.

I don't know how it works, but we can focus sexually on other partners while being very tuned into connected to each other at the same time. The people we play with are couples who feel the way we do about it - they love seeing each other having sex. We tend to intermingle all of us off and on through the play session with kisses, touches, and interesting positions. There's a lot of variety to it. It's not planned or staged this way, it just flows. Our being in the same room seems to cause both of us to be fueled more passionately for our playmates.

Does he say exactly WHY he doesn't want to see you having sex with another while he's with another woman? Will it make him feel jealous? Jealous about what, exactly? What else does he room he'll be feeling? Since you two are far from the same right now on what your swinging style will be as a couple, you'll really have to room that out before you could go further.

If you can't work it out, it might mean that swinging just isn't for the two of you. Don't compromise your comfort level and go all-in swap his style, going against how you feel just to make this happen - that never goes well.

Not in my case, but I'm sure there have been plenty of couples who were at this impasse. I'd like to hear how they overcame it, too. It's not un usual. I believe it's not as popular a choice as same-room, but there are those who prefer separate room.

Others go either way but usually still have a preference for one or the other. There will be those who would say that wanting to experience swinging in the same room is for novices newbiesand that savvy and more experienced swingers "graduate" to separate room swinging.

That may be the experience of some, but not all. For many of us, same-room swinging is a preference regardless of level of experience in swinging.

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There have been lots of thre on this board about same-room vs. What if you and your husband search for those here and read them together? This board can be a great resource when you are trying to figure things out as a couple. Reading here might open things up, give you both a lot more to think about and talk about.

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Good luck to you. Usually, we've started out in separate rooms, especially with a new couple. This allows us the opportunity to communicate with our new partners, learn a bit about them, and approach same-room sex with better understanding. Inter-marital sexual relations are all exciting, but I'm sure the most erotic sights I've seen have been Mrs. Alura with another partner. Still, the times alone with the other wife have a charm of their own and I'd hate to have not enjoyed them.

Just call me wishy-washy. At this point, we are separate room swap. That is what I am most comfortable with the bf would be more than willing to be in the same room. For me it's a level of distraction that another couple would bring being in the same room. And if I'm distracted, I will not reach orgasm and honestly the odds of me getting to that point with someone that is not a full time partner is slim to nil as it is I mean damn, I get distracted if there's a porn playing in the background which was happening at one couple's home when we went there to play.

All doors were left open, there was a direct line of sight to the other room, so if any one wanted to watch all they had to do was look up and over.

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So I wasn't afraid for my safety or anything like that. As we get more into this, and I am more comfortable in my skin, then I'm sure we will move onto same room. Although our first swap was with everyone present in the same place we were out in public though and I was ok with that.

Of course, when you are at a place where pretty much everyone is out walking around naked anyway I was just in a place that we were comfortable any way. We just can't imagine separate rooms.

What’s better? same vs separate room swinging

We like experiencing this as a couple But who knows, I guess that could change. We didn't think we would be doing same room sex with other couples at one time either. We're also a couple that can't imagine being in separate rooms.

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