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It's a truth universally acknowledged that breasts are incredibly awesome.

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Breasts can be pleasurable to play with for the one doing the playing and the breast-haver alike. Some people can even have orgasms from breast play alone. Others need breast play in combination with genital stimulation.

Like any other sexual act, consent is important when it comes to breast play. Keep in mind that some people may not want you to play with their breasts.

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Trans and genderqueer folks may not want their breasts touched. You can and should as your partner directly what they feel comfortable with, or you can start slow by tracing your hand across their shoulders and collarbone area.

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If they tense up or move your hand away, move on to other parts of the body. Be aware that breast sensitivity can change throughout the month. There will probably be certain points during the menstrual cycle where they feel much more sensitive than usual. There may even be times when they are too sensitive for any sort of breast play. Breasts also change a lot after a person has given birth and while breastfeeding.

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They may not want any breast contact for a while, or may need you to be much more gentle than usual. I have never met anyone who enjoyed having their breasts squeezed this way especially not as sexual initiation. The same goes with kneading. In general, breast sensitivity comes from the skin, not from the fat of the breast itself.

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These moves also neglect the nipple, which tends to be the most sensitive part of the breast more on this later. Breast play can feel pleasurable even through clothing, and it can also be a nice way to tease them.

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Rub their breasts over their shirt. To evoke a sense of teenage nostalgia, put your hands up their shirt and play with their breasts over the bra. Spend some time tracing their collarbone with your finger, then kissing along it. Touch and kiss along the sides of the breasts, without going straight for the nipple.

2) don't head for the nipple right away.

Most people tend to squeeze the entire boob, or focus on just the nipple. As the names imply, the underboob is the lower part of the breast, and the sideboob is the outer edge the side near the armpit.

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This area tends to respond best to delicate touch. Very gently trace a fingertip along this sensitive curve. Start at the outer edge and slowly work your way around to the middle of the chest. You can also do this with your tongue, or with light kisses.

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Nipples are sort of like clitorises: some people can hardly stand direct contact, while others need very firm pressure. Start off by lightly stroking the nipple and circling the areola the flat section around the pointy nipple. If your partner pushes their body towards you or makes a lot of noise, try gradually increasing pressure. If they wants more intensity, try gently pinching the nipples between your thumb and forefinger.

Or you can try pulling on the nipples: Cup a breast in your hand and pull on the nipple with your thumb and forefinger, pulling the breast further away from the ribcage. Get your lips, tongue, and teeth involved as well as your hands. You can lick, suck, and nibble on the breasts. Try licking the curve from sideboob to underboob, or sucking or nibbling on the nipples.

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You can also get some temperature play involved by licking a breast then lightly blowing onto the moistened area. If your partner likes a lot of pressure, try sucking and biting on their nipples. Again, start off gentle, and gradually increase the pressure until you find what works. You can use vibrators or feather ticklers to create new sensations on the breasts.

Even running a silk tie or scarf over the breasts can feel great. If your partner likes more intense nipple play, you can buy nipple clamps or suckers.

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You can also try blindfolding your partner, and touching their breasts with different toys or materials. Or try using use lube or massage oil to help your hands really slide around on their breasts.

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Another way you can learn what your partner likes is to ask them to touch their own breasts. Watch the specific ways your partner touches their own body, and try to get a sense of how much pressure is involved. This article was originally published in and updated on Nov. Was in a 4 year relationship with a great guy. It has taken me the six months we have been apart to realize that since he was married for 20 years and had like 2 partners before that, he really did think his bedroom skilz were the shit.

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He is back with his ex-wife now so maybe it can help her. The A. About Lifehacker Advisor Lifehacker Store. Illustration: Jim Cooke.

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